Love, Purpose, and Life's Little Imperfections > Will he ever come home?
I'm sorry for your loss...and all the pain and confusion that is accompanying it. You are in an unbelievably difficult situation and you sound like a very caring and concerned sister. As you can see in your own family, everyone has a different way of dealing with your mother's death...some ways seem healthier than others. Your 16 year old brother who is into drugs, and disappearing from the family for stretches of time, seems to really be struggling - and refusing any help. I can only imagine how much you want to talk to him, get him into see the therapist, and generally protect him from harm. But that may not be possible, since he has his own agenda right now. You and your family may want to discuss possible interventions with your therapist or a substance abuse expert and see if there is something that can be done (especially since he is a minor). But as helpless as you feel, you have to know that you cannot save him or make him better on your own. He has to want to get help and then you can support him. It's an incredibly frustrating position that you (and your family) are in, but clearly you care a lot, and I bet he knows that. For now, take care of yourself. That's the best thing you can do to be and stay healthy. Then you will be able to support others (including your brother) when right time comes. Good luck to you. All the best, Catherine Birndorf
Catherine Birndorf
Recently my mother passed away and everybody in my house is dealing with it pretty badly. My parents are seperated and my dad had to move back in to take care of my teenage brothers who are very immature. My two younger brothers are 15 and the other 16. The 16 year old decided he didn't want to stay home anymore and live with the rules of the home so he's been sneaking out of the home and staying out for long periods of time. This time he has been gone for a week and a couple of days. We are pretty certain he is safe but he has no extra clothing, toothbrush, etc. I guess I understand why he doesn't want to be at home but I just want to help him in some way but he doesn't seem to want any help. He refuses to talk to our therapist or any one of us. I am 23 years old and my older sister is 26. My situation is pretty complicated and my brother is also into drugs. Any idea or suggestion will help, especially if anybody is going through/has went through something like this before. Thanks